The Only Other Option Is To Forget

Work's been slow today, which was partly me (post-party recovery is going well, thankyouverymuch) and partly due to data that I needed not being available. Which means I had time to just stare into space and listen to my Spotify playlist. Which meant The Used and 30 Seconds To Mars. 

I still can't believe how these two bands managed to suddenly rock my world so hard it almost hurts. What really bugs me is that both of them have been around for so long, I had 10 years to find them and they only hit me now. It would have been totally awesome if I would have been there from the start, like I've been with New Model Army or Die Ärzte (oh, those were the days), when they played tiny clubs. But yeah, I really wasn't. I'm pretty sure I heard about The Used before and I definitely remember seeing 30 Seconds on MTV and thinking 'yeah, nice, but no'.

Back in 2002/2003, when I probably came across The Used, I still was a die-hard New Model Army fan and I guess their music just didn't sound right to me back then. I was in a completely different place from now, not only geographically (Cologne, Germany) but also in my head (numb doesn't even come close). Things were strange, but not quite strange enough. 

I've long ago fallen out of love with New Model Army, haven't been to any of their gigs or listened to their songs for years. Last time I tried, for good ol' times sake, it just felt weird. I remember what their music meant to me, so many songs connected to memories, most of them pretty good memories at that, but the part inside me that jumped with glee when I listened to their songs is now mildly bored. 

In the past 10 years I've been on a pretty wild journey, not only in regards to music but let's just concentrate on that for now. I went from New Model Army to Social Distortion, then crossed over to Pendulum, hit sleaze for a bit (Bullets & Octane and Buckcherry), detoured via the Dresden Dolls and got a bit intellectual with Dan Le Sac & Scroobius Pip. All the while crashing head-first into Psy Trance, because I can multi-task. 

But until 6 months ago I just wasn't ready for 30 Seconds To Mars and all their awesomeness just yet and now I'm apparently somewhere where The Used applies. They make that little part inside me jump up and down excitedly and bang it's little head and go all emo on me. Same goes for 30 Seconds To Mars, who kicked that part into gear again and kicked the shit out of it, too.

All the time I'm thinking it shouldn't be like that anymore, I'm over 40 for god's sake, I should be at a place in my life where I'm settled and not have random emo attacks and be just too grown-up to get all jumpy and obsessed with bands like this (and the pretty boys in those bands, too). Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy I'm not and that I can still feel it and know it makes sense the way it is because that's my life. I'm still searching, I'm still not quite there yet (wherever that is, I really wish I knew), still wanna go somewhere and find out what else is around the corner.

So yeah, turns out I'm now in exactly the right head-space to appreciate The fucking Used.